101 things I cancan't do in Naruto
by catki19
Summary: A list of things that you can/can't do in Naruto. Warning crack and insanity rated for a reson


** I got my inspiration from cookies**

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1. Do not give Naruto ramen

2. Do not take Naruto's ramen

3. Do not do basically anything that has to do with Naruto and ramen.

4. Do not call Naruto 'Foxy'

5. Do not call Sasuke 'Bird butt' or 'SasUKE'

6. Do not call Sakura 'Pinky'

7. Disregard last note

8. Do not tell Kakashi Tobi is Obito (He's not)

9. Do not tell Deidara Tobi is an Uchiha (He is, but c'mon thats just mean)

10. Do not tell Tobi he is a bad boy

11. Do not ask Sasori if he'll be your sex puppet

12. We all know he's Deidara's

13. It dosn't matter if he denies it

14. Do not chop off Hidans head, hold it up in the air and say "To be, or not to be"

15. Not even if Kakuzu pays you

16. It dosn't matter how much he -WOW THATS ALLOT OF ZEROS

17. Disregard that preform number 14

18. Do not make Sakura and Ino kiss like Naruto and Sasuke did in eppisode 3

19. Or take pictures/videos of said kiss

20. Do not refer to Kankuro as 'kitty'

21. Kiba is not a 'cute puppy'

22. And I will not ask if i can 'take him home' or 'keep him'

23. Not even if he wants to go

24. Kabuto is not a pokemon

25. Sasuke is not Harry potter

26. Orochimaru is not Lord Voldemort

27. He's his second cosin

28. Sasori, Deidara and Tobi are not having a threesome

29. I will not ask to join said threesome

30. I will not water Zetzu

31. I will not call Gaara 'Mr Sandman'

32. Shikamaru is not a pimp

33. Just kidding

34. But Temari is not his bitch

35. Neji is

36. I will not give Sasuke fangirls a tour of his house

37. Nor will I give them the keys to his house

38. Or his adress

39. I will not question Itachi's gender

40. I will not question Neji's gender

41. Nor will I question Haku or Deidara's gender

42. Cause there girls

43. If they deny it tell them to prove it

44. When they do try not to pass out

45. Deidara is not Ino's long lost brouther

46. Or sister

47. He's her cosin

48. When Naruto finds Sasuke again I will not play "Baby one more time"

49. I will not ask Deidara if he uses his hand mouths to pleasure

50. Nor will I sugest such things

51. I will not ask Kisame or/and Itachi if they went at it for 72hrs

52. I will not ask Itachi if he can 'go at it' for 72hrs

53. He can, now stop asking

54. I will not point to Neji's curse mark and yell "Nazi"

55. Neji is not a nazi

's curse mark is not Orochimaru's hickie

57. And I will stop reffering to it as such

58. I will not call Orochimaru 'Snakey'

59. Ten-Ten is not pregnate with Neji's child

60. It's Lee's

61. Didn't see that coming did ya?

62. Deidara is not Barbie

63. Tobi is not Ken

64. Hidan is not Shikamaru's fuck buddy

65. He's Kakuzu's

66. Hidan did not get tenticle raped

67. 'Cause it's not rape if you like it

68. And trust me he likes it

69. Alot

70. I will not cover Sasuke in glitter to make him sparkle

71. Sasuke is not a vampire

72. Vanpire's **DON'T** sparkle

73. And they never will

74. I will not ask Kisame if he's half shark

75. Nor will I chalange him to prove it

76. But if I do I will take pictures

77. I will not put Naruto on a leash and give him to Sasuke for his birthday

78. I will not ask if Kiba dose it 'doggy style'

79. When I see Kiba I will not play 'Who Let The Dogs Out'

80. Nor will I play 'Jaws' when i see Kisame

81. But I will play 'Pop Goes The Weasel' when I see Itachi

82. I will not introduce Sakura to Karin

83. In a small room

84. With no way out

85. Nor will I lock said room

86. Or put a spy cam in said room

87. Nor will I take pictures/videos with said cam

88. Or put them on Youtube

89. I will not read SasuNaru fanfiction to Naruto or Sasuke

90. Or Sasuke

91. Or any of his fangirls

92. I will not introduce **ANY** Naruto Charaters to the Internet

93. Especially not Jirya

94. 'Cause we all know the Internet is for porn

95. Pein is not Naruto's father

96. Tsunade is not my 'Sexy Mama'

97. I will not refer to Chakera as 'The Force'

98. When Naruto goes Kubi I will not play 'Animal I Have Become'

99. Nor will I do this when Kiba battels

100. I will not refer to Orochimaru, Lord Voldemort and Michel Jackson as the 'Pedo Squad'

101. I will not give any Naruto charaters this or tell them where the author lives

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**People there is a little blue word down there. That word is _review_ please press it **


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